Chai Lifeline Offers Guidance to Parents in the Aftermath of Chabad Emissary’s Tragic Murder
In the wake of the tragic loss of Rabbi Zvi Kogan, who was murdered in the United Arab Emirates, Rabbi Dr. David Fox, Director of Chai Lifeline’s Crisis and Trauma Services, shared a message of guidance and support to help families navigate the emotional impact of such events. He emphasizes the importance of addressing these moments with sensitivity and care, particularly when speaking to children.
Honoring Courage and Service
Rabbi Fox pays tribute to Rabbi Kogan and acknowledges the incredible dedication of those in the Chabad network who work tirelessly across the globe. These men and women are selflessly committed to serving others—whether reconnecting Jews who may feel estranged or supporting their local communities with spiritual and physical assistance. Their efforts are essential and inspiring, even in the face of unimaginable challenges.
Supporting Children Through Difficult Times
Rabbi Fox offers three key strategies for parents and caregivers to approach discussions about tragedy with their children. His advice focuses on fostering open communication, offering reassurance, and sharing age-appropriate information to help children process difficult emotions. This while many of us are processing these difficult emotions ourselves.
1. Listen Without Judgment
Children often hear about tragic events through media, conversations, or social interactions, making it difficult to shield them completely. Rabbi Fox encourages parents to create a safe space where children feel comfortable expressing their thoughts and emotions.
“Allow them their voice,” he advises. “Don’t be critical or judgmental of what they say—just listen.” By validating their feelings, parents can help their children feel heard and supported.
2. Share Information Thoughtfully
While it’s important to clarify the facts of a situation, Rabbi Fox urges parents to avoid overwhelming children with unnecessary details or graphic imagery. Instead, provide information that is accurate and age-appropriate, focusing only on what children need to know to understand the situation.
“Don’t answer questions they’re not asking,” he emphasizes. This approach helps prevent children from being overexposed to distressing content while still addressing their curiosity and concerns.
3. Offer Reassurance
In times of uncertainty, children need to feel safe and secure. Rabbi Fox highlights the importance of reassuring children that tragic events, while deeply upsetting, are unusual. He encourages parents to focus on the positive actions being taken to ensure safety and to emphasize the enduring values of kindness, care, and resilience that define the Jewish community.
“Remind them of the mission that has guided us for centuries,” he said. “We remain committed to doing good, helping others, and finding strength in our faith.”
Looking Forward with Hope
Rabbi Fox concludes with a message of optimism, expressing hope for an end to suffering and a brighter future for all. In times of grief and uncertainty, he reminded the community of the vital work being done by organizations like Chai Lifeline to support families and individuals in need.
For those seeking additional guidance, Chai Lifeline offers a 24/7 Crisis Line, ensuring help is available whenever it’s needed. Families can reach the Crisis Line at 1-855-CRISIS.
One must be careful when speaking to children to not make something bigger to them than it was in the first place. First find out what they know b’chlal and how they seem to be dealing with it. Sometimes “therapy” or ‘awareness talks…’ can be the very things that make the kids start thinking, hold on, is there something that I’m supposed to be scared of now… When they otherwise would have heard the news on some level and then ‘moved on’…. May there be only revealed good news but all Yidden. Please Aibershter no more sorrow or pain. Moshiach… Read more »
Thank you Chai Lifeline for the work you do
Thank you this is very helpful