By Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch, LMFT
Over the last few years, I’ve noticed a subtle yet significant shift in the number of people who struggle with addiction in our communities, yet few people receive the right care that they need to recover.
Whereas 30 years ago you might have known a few individuals who drank too much, today’s addictions are widespread and include (but not limited to) internet and relationships, alcohol, marijuana, gambling, opioids and LSD.
Although alcohol has been on the scene from time immemorial – and a part of our culture – the emphasis from just making just a l’chaim to tasting worldly experiences has changed our habits and I don’t believe we are better off because of it.
To simply tell an addicted individual that they should just attend a 12-step support group is not enough. A person with an addiction needs a comprehensive plan and an ongoing relationship with a recovery coach who can guide them and help them overcome any potential relapses.
The truth is that when you know someone who is addicted there is no one else who will help your loved one unless you or someone else in your community takes the responsibility to help coach them towards recovery. Studies tell us that 80% of all addicts relapse within the year of leaving a treatment center and that between 25-35% of people who complete addiction treatment will be readmitted to treatment within one year. However, Recovery Coaching is one of the most effective tools in sustaining long-term recovery.
We are launching the Addiction Recovery Coaching program, a 15-week online training with special guest speakers:
Dr. Judith Gisel, neuroscientist and author of “Never Enough: The Neuroscience and Experience of Addiction”
Mellisa Killeen, author of “Recovery Coaching”, expert in the field of Recovery Coaching
Justin Phillips, mother of son who OD’d from opioids and founder of overdoselifeline.org
Dr. Lee Radosh, one of the leading Addiction Medicine experts in the United States
Dr. Julia Loytsker, a psychologist who specializes in therapy to overcome addiction from the Caron Treatment Center.
On the program, which is accredited by the International Coach Federation, you will learn core recovery coaching skills that can significantly reduce the chances of relapse. Some of the core modalities of coaching include Motivational Interviewing (MI), CBT, Client-focused coaching, the CRAFT model, Torah-based psychology, and Viktor Frankl’s Logotherapy that helps coachees find more meaning in their lives without drugs.
It will cover:
- Understand the science and cures for addiction
- Spot the signs of drugs/alcohol/Internet and relationship addictions
- Offer guidance in developing new behavior patterns
- Create an effective plan of action
- Direct that person to the right medical/group/therapeutic resources
- Utilize the teachings of Rabbi Dr. Avraham Twerski, z”l
Participants will also learn how to connect to individuals through empathy and uncover more meaning in the recovery’s life. They will also begin to understand why people become addicted.
There is no question that alcohol and drugs are seen as an answer to the questions: How can I reduce my pain? How can I feel better about myself? What can I do that frees me from my limitations? But, is the answer they get true? Do drugs that temporarily reduce negative emotions really help in the long run?
At a lecture around two years ago, Dr. Eli Rosen asked the audience “What is the opposite of addiction?” He answered that the opposite of addiction is connection. I would say this to be true on several levels: connection to one’s true self, connection to other people, and connection to G-d.
As a therapist who believes in the power of spirituality taught to us by our Rebeim and informed by the psychology of Viktor Frankl, I know the answers to these questions lie deep within and beyond us at the same time.
Greater awareness of one’s G-dliness gives us the only true freedom from the psychological limitations of the self and our traumas. This calls upon us to deepen our understanding of our true self informed by Chasidus. I’m not talking simply about a superficial form of study, but rather about a deep and personal exploration that can only be reached through contemplation and connection with those who care.
Concerning the second answer, Viktor Frankl alluded to this when he wrote “a person cannot reach behind himself and pick himself”. Psychotherapy is limited, especially when it only focuses on the self. Rather, we must recognize the spark within a person that searches for meaning. In the midbar we were guided by a flame and a cloud that was always ahead of the camp of Israel, implying that we must be guided to something beyond ourselves, to fulfill a purpose or meaning. This is why the Torah tells us that “Hashem went before them by day in a pillar of cloud to cause it to lead them on the way and at night in a pillar of fire to give them light”. The pillars of cloud and fire we’re always ahead of Am Yisrael. Meaning can only be found in things beyond ourselves.
To help our children, teens and adults overcome addiction, we need to help them find more meaning in their lives, articulate what “sparks” they want to elevate, and to connect to the resources that can help change their lives. Becoming an Addiction Recovery Coach is the first step in that direction.
–Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch, LMFT is a licensed psychotherapist who helps treat depression, anxiety, trauma and addiction. He is the director of torahpsychology.org where he is running a new Addiction Recovery Coaching program to help combat addiction starting July 5, 2021. To register visit www.torahpsychology.org or call Rabbi Schonbuch at 646-428-4723.
If we are already presenting statistics, then shouldn’t we include the numbers of recovering addicts that have relapsed that had Recovery Coaching vs recovering addicts without Recovery Coaching? Meaning, that without the numbers, why should we assume that Recovery Coaching helps? Apparently rehab and 12 steps programs don’t, so why would Recovery Coaching help? Please provide numbers.