By COLlive staff
Dozens of married women in Crown Heights came together this week to hear Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch, a respected psychologist who works with married couples, on their quest to healthy intimacy.
Schonbuch’s new book, “Getting Closer,” brings up many issues that are common in Orthodox couples and he addressed some of them at the lecture.
“Unfortunately, many couples turn to secular self-help books for advice,” said the New York marriage and family therapist about couples facing challenges or difficulties in their marital life.
“The danger of this is that the authors of these books may not have had the proper training in psychology or medicine nor are they sensitive to the needs of Orthodox couples,” he said. “Accepting their advice at face value may cause more guilt, confusion, and can even lead to prolonged difficulty.”
Sitting alongside Dr. Rivkah Friedman, a physical therapist who specializes in women’s health, Schonbuch addressed issues plaguing marriages such as Internet Addiction, overcoming childhood abuse, desire disorders, depression and anxiety, pregnancy and postpartum depression.
The lecture was hosted in the home of Rabbi Meir and Shaindy Gutnick and was also broadcast online with some 58 women tuning in. It was organized by Mrs. Bracha Bard-Wigdor of Balaboostas.comwomen’s forum (visit the site for future events).
Following the lecture, participants had the opportunity to present questions to both Schonbuch and Friedman, regarding their professional experiences in dealing with different topics and issues. The emcee was Mrs. Fraidy Yanover
Three of Schonbuch’s books were raffled off at the end of the night and healthy refreshments were served, as participants got to meet, socialize, and enjoy the end of an informative event.
To purchase the book or to read a free preview, visit www.JewishMarriageSupport.com
Keep up the great work Brocha; and Yashaar koach to your husband who encourages and supports you.
B”H
With most our wives, “k,a,h” sometimes having 2-4 children under 5-years old, why didn’t Mr. Sconbuch dare to broach the proverbial elephant-on-the-china-shop: That dangerous intersection of peri- and postpartum depression and sholem bias? Why does it boil down to:”She’s going to classes–He’s not going,” or vice-versa?
According the N.I.H. an estimated 25-50% of Women experience at least some form of the so-called “baby-blues” to full-blown postpartum psychosis.
Why was that left out?
Marriage is like a ping-pung game. The ball you shoot is the ball you get back. The harder you shoot it the harder you get it back. Shoot a positive ball you’ll get back a positive ball. When one spouse goes to classes and has the right understanding on how man-woman work, then it automatically fixes the whole picture. To all woman, stop complaining why man don’t have classes (if would definitely be a good thing is they do), if you’ll go to classes and take it seriously, it will for sure cause a positively revealed impact on your husband.… Read more »
Why trash the men?
I run to classes when I hear that there are any. I already bought the book and I love it!! IT IS VERY IMPORTANT and I urge many people to buy it and read it. Finally someone is dealing with such important issues. I feel relieved. I am single and having a real hard time finding a shidduch – but I know that when I find my Shidduch she will be really pleased because I am the kind of guy that looks for these important pieces of information. So other Men – listen to some sound advice and get to… Read more »
Men need to have these types of classes. It is a must for them !!! These classes should be offered for free, online. This way, it will be more accesable for them, and wont be uncomfortable to show their face at classes. Please, provide online access for men to view marriage classes.
is it possible to post a photo of the handout, perhaps on the balaboosta blog?
There was one time the Rebbe wrote a woman a letter telling her that her husband works so hard (which provides for the family) that it’s no surprise that he’s not in the best mood, etc. All would do well to remember those wise words. So many who’ve turned to divorce wish they had. That in no way excuses an laxity on the part of the man, but if a woman understands the man, how much he tries without saying so (and would never say so), they’ll understand that they’re truly appreciated even if pride leads ch”v to harsh words.
The bottom line is that today so many forget that marriage is about commitment and dedication. Also, many people go through rough patches, but it’s morally necessary and better for you too to stay together and work it out rather than to give up and run to what is in fact destruction. Funny how Hashem created a world in which if you do what’s morally right, even if hard at the beginning and against popular opinion at the time, in the end everything comes out best precisely because you did what was right. If we keep that in mind, we’ll… Read more »
You both are making big assumptions about men.
MAKE CLASSES FOR MEN! They NEED it MORE than the Lady of the house! The SMART ones will go! HAPPY WIFE HAPPY LIFE! i wish the men would understand that! It is so so true!
i once attended a class for men and it was full…. most men when asked about key decisions they will say ” i gotta ask the boss” women run the house , and almost everything else ,they are called the ” akeres habayis” in the jewish religion…
Will this talk be posted anywhere?
The women are RUNNING to classes.
The women are READING books.
The women are trying to make their marriages work.
The men won’t go a class, read a book, or put one ounce of effort into their marriage.
Let me see an event with a class on marriage for the men???
How many will show up? 000000000000000000000
It was a great class! Thank you!